


Would U

by byunnybacon



Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Internalised Homophobia, Red Velvet, it's really mostly just yeri and joy, kpop, lesbian joy, no underage smut i promise, red summer era, there's a few kissing scenes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-04
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-07-06 20:54:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15893973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/byunnybacon/pseuds/byunnybacon
Summary: 'Kim Yerim makes me feel more alive than i have ever felt in my life.'Kim Yerim made Park Sooyoung feel as if everything was going to be okay.Park Sooyoung was a mystery that Kim Yerim had yet to figure out.In other words:Park Sooyoung's a panicked lesbian





	1. Chapter 1

_'Kim Yerim makes me feel more alive than i have ever felt in my life.'_

"why is your stage name joy?" asked Yerim, the two girls sitting on Sooyoung's bed. This had become an occurrent thing, Yerim coming into Sooyoung's room without any warning, acting as if it was completely normal. the idea of Yerim becoming so casual with Sooyoung had boggled Sooyoung. Even though Sooyoung was older, she seemed bare shielded against the force of Yerim. Abiding by her terms no matter the consequence, no matter the idea, it was just Sooyoung's flaw.

Being in love with Yerim.

"Because I'm happy?" spoke Sooyoung with a stance of uneasiness. Knowing Yerim she was probably going to make some snarky remark, to which Sooyoung would smile to, then feel guilty for being happy altogether. Sooyoung knew that she shouldn't be so emotionally invested with Yerim.

But there were things about Yerim that made it seem as if the universe wanted Sooyoung to suffer from her feelings.

Her voice,

"I don't think so," said Yerim with her signature thinking face, lips pouting out just slightly, brows furrowed with concentration. But Sooyoung could see the mischief in Yerim's eyes. Yerim leaned closer, away from the sitting criss-cross applesauce and more into of a hand dependent position. Yerim balanced herself on the mattress with both hands, her face the closest thing to Sooyoung's face.

Her humor and mischief,

"I don't think you're happy," Yerim started, hand on Sooyoung's thigh. Sooyoung inwardly cursed at herself for letting her stylists wear shorts, "I think you bring Joy."

"You're so incredibly basic," Sooyoung said, as she shifted back, Yerim's warm hand was taken off her thigh. Soonyoung changed from facing Yerim to face the wall, her legs hanging off her mattress. Attempting to hide her heated cheeks. Sooyoung hates to do this. To do this to Yerim.

But Yerim doesn't understand.

"Sooyoung," spoke Yerim softly. Sooyoung suppressed a shiver at the act of Yerim using her real name. Sooyoung was the closest to Yerim, the other members had noticed too. The way that Sooyoung's eyes traced Yerim's lips as she spoke, the way she'd hide away after Yerim did something border-line affectionate in their dorm. Sooyoung had consoled with Seulgi. Seulgi understood the idea of being repressed was painful. Sooyoung was paralyzed in a state of horror and pain. But it was all for Yerim.

"Why are you like this?" exclaimed Yerim lightly, shaking her head as she attempted to put her hand on Sooyoung's own. Only for Sooyoung to shy away again, scooting farther away from the younger.

"Why are you so far away?"

The question hung in the air like a dreary cloud about the rain. Because I love you, Sooyoung was incredibly close to saying it. But she knew she couldn't, she hated this. She hated herself, she hated Yerim for being so perfect, she hated the fact that she had feelings for Yerim. She was so fed up.

Yerim could feel Sooyoung's composure breaking her. Yerim's words rendering Sooyoung utterly vulnerable.

Yerim heard a sniffle, and only then did Sooyoung give a reply, in an incredibly weak voice.

"Let's go to sleep okay?"


	2. Chapter 2

Yerim remembered when she first walked in on Seulgi and Sooyoung conversing about Sooyoung’s special someone. Yerim woke up at approximately 2:30 in the morning to steal Irene’s leftover pizza when she saw that a light had been left on in the corridor outside their dorm. Following the light trail, Yerim found herself behind the small dance room door in the girls’ apartment complex.

“I don’t know how I developed feelings for her. She’s just always been so nice to me,” spoke a voice in a hushed tone. Yerim knew that voice all to well, only to know that it was Sooyoung’s. The next five minutes was spent on Sooyoung attempting to explain why she had this crush. Who was a girl. It sounded like Sooyoung was more debating to herself, then talking to another person.

“Well, what do you like about her?” asked another voice. The strength and level of the voice could only be described as Kang Seulgi’s.

“Her eyes, the way she treats people even anti’s, it's with a sort of fairness. I’d describe her to the sun, but I feel like that’s too stereotypical. She’s bright, but she has flaws. Like any other human being. I guess you could say she brings an atmosphere,” Yerim could almost hear the smile in Sooyoung’s voice.

“So she’s like cheese. She’s bright, has holes in her personality, and smells. She just wreaks of atmospheric smell.” But of course, Seulgi would ruin the peaceful atmosphere. There was a moment of silence until Yerim heard Sooyoung’s soft chuckle.

“Yeah, like cheese… I guess,” trailed of Sooyoung. Yerim had had enough of the conversation, she already felt a little guilty for eavesdropping on Sooyoung. But Yerim was the maknae, and maknae’s constantly had to be in the other member’s business. At least, she hoped that was good enough excuse.

Yerim got up and crept away, slipping unnoticed by the other two members.

As Yerim got herself into bed, thoughts on the incident were now stirring in her head.

Yerim had decided to keep to herself, there was no point in carrying on the conversation with Sooyoung. She had already confided with Seulgi. Yerim knew of the strict constraints of LGBTQ+ people living in Korea, Sooyoung might be a little uncomfortable knowing there was a third party who knew about her little secret. Yerim never opposed the idea of same sex relationships, despite what her parent’s views on it. She couldn’t bring herself to suppress someone’s happiness.

It just seemed wrong. Why would Yerim willingly take someone’s happiness away?

The world was constantly becoming more liberal, new ideas popped up in the worlds. What’s to say that same sex couples have been a long running thing and people only now have had the strength to acknowledge it?

Yerim always wondered what it would be like to be a lesbian.

It must be convenient, not having to explain your period and bra and makeup expenses to your partner. Yerim knew she couldn’t jump to conclusions, what about Sungjae?

During the “We Got Married” show the couple we’re featured in, Yerim could tell that the two were slowly falling in love. Sooyoung had never expressed it, but her eyes lit up every time she saw Sungjae walk into the room, or every time he texted her. She woke up early on days for filming, and sulked after the filming was over. She had even cried when the show was over.

Was it possible to like both genders?

Yerim didn’t know.

Maybe Yerim could ask Wendy, she was from a more western background, she must know a thing or two.

With these thoughts, Yerim drifted off to sleep, Wendy’s stolen stash of tteoboki long forgotten.


	3. Chapter 3

It was the final song of the Red Velvet three year anniversary fan meet, Sooyoung’s personal favourite too of the Red Summer Album. She enjoyed singing the song, there was good sentiment. But then something happened that made Park Sooyoung and the rest of the Red Velvet incredibly surprised. 

When Sooyoung thought she herself was singing, it was actually the ReVeluvs taking over the spotlight. Her voice, despite the microphone, was washed away in the sound of thousands of fans singing the song. Sooyoung filled with pride, she couldn’t stop herself from smiling. Sooyoung detached the earpiece from her ear. She wished this moment would be help on for the rest of her life, ignoring the busy schedules and anti-fans, celebrating the aspects of idol life that she wanted to celebrate. Regardless of that, Sooyoung wanted to spend this moment with someone special. 

Thankfully, there was a Kim Yerim close by. 

Yerim was on the other side of the stage, her hand over her mouth staring in amazement for what she was witnessing. Being so close to the audience, the ReVeluvs had started screaming… louder than usual. Sooyoung stared at Yerim’s back, until the younger turned back around, meeting her eyes. The former smiled at Sooyoung as she waved from the other side of the stage. Sooyoung smiled as she felt light headed from happiness. Yerim looked so peaceful and happy. Then an incredibly idea popped into Sooyoung’s head. 

She could kiss her. 

She could kiss Yerim, right then and there. 

The moment would be perfect. And in a split second, Sooyoung found her feet walking on her own, 

        right 

left 

        right 

left

 

Her pace quickened as she reached the other side of the stage, she grabbed Yerim making a few fans gasp. Yerim’s eyes screamed surprised, but Sooyoung hadn’t minded. She wanted Yerim so badly, she wanted to kiss her. But she was reminded of what Seulgi had said to her, “remember the consequences.” 

This memory led Sooyoung to reality, her confidence faded and she let go of Yerim’s shoulders. Sooyoung inwardly shook her head, she was so foolish to think this might’ve worked out, she started to walk back to her portion of the stage when she felt a slight tug on her wrist. Yerim had started to clutch her wrist. In which, Yerim led Sooyoung to set down on the side of the stage with her. The two girl’s legs draped over the side, and Yerim intertwined her fingers with Sooyoung and smiled back up at the older. Proceeding to lean her head on Sooyoung. Sooyoung heart pounded to the beat of the synth, and the moment couldn’t have been anymore perfect. 

‘ _You better know_ _  
_ 눈부신 빛을 따라 하루를 그려

_I draw each day following the bright light_ _  
_

_You better know_ _  
_ 이런 널 기다려온 세상이 있어

_There’s a world that’s been waiting for you as you are_

_So are you ready or not_ _  
_ 이 순간을 놓치지 마

시간이 흘러가잖아

_Tick tock tick tock_ ’

_So are you ready or not_

_Don’t let go of this moment_ _  
Because the time is flying by_

_Tick tock tick tock_ ’

_You better know_

언제나 너의 곁에 내가 있을게

you better know

I will always be by your side’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm thinking of changing the title from 'Would U?' to 'You Better Know' ????  
>  i don't know if i should   
> but it makes more sense in the context


	4. Chapter 4

“Can you like both sexes?” Inquired Yerim as she and Wendy were sat down in Wendy and Irene’s dorm. Wendy’s phone was placed in her hand as she scrolled anonymously through twitter.

Unwavering, Wendy replied, “yeah. It’s called being Bisexual.” 

Yerim hummed in thoughtfulness, new concepts and ideas filling her head. This was all so new to her, she hadn’t even thought about liking girls herself. She’d just been computed into liking boys, it was the only way Yerim knew how to think. She found it completely cynical. It biologically made sense, but maybe not so mentally. She’s seen few articles about how artists that came out in South Korea were socially shunned. But it wasn’t as if she could’ve done anything about it. South Korea is just a conservative country. Everything had to be done traditionally. And yet, with all these old concepts combing the new, she reminded herself that society could change and that South Korean society _was,_ in fact, changing. Changing slowly, but still changing. 

“Yerim.” Spoke Wendy, a mixture of concern and annoyance in the older’s voice, “I’ve been saying your name for the past two minutes.”

Yerim didn’t say anything, but she gave a look to Wendy to indicate that she was listening.

“Why’d you ask?” Wondered Wendy as she looked at the younger. The younger shrugged, Yerim had common decency. She couldn’t out Sooyoung. 

“I saw a ReVeluv tweet about it but I didn’t know it was a thing,” said Yerim as she looked down at her phone, pretending to check twitter. 

“It’s always good to learn,” spoke Wendy, also resigning to her digital confines.

*

“Today was, intense,” spoke the younger as the five of them melted tiredly into the seats of the minivan. The older members hummed in a agreement, letting the former know she was heard. Sooyoung was in the very backseat, looking out the window. She wasn’t sitting next to Yerim, so there was no point to look at the members at the current moment. Sooyoung’s gaze flickered out towards the streets. The lights illuminating Seoul was always something that Sooyoung remembered. She doesn’t know why. But every time someone says Seoul, Sooyoung’s thoughts drift back to the lit up signs screaming for attention in the busy streets of her country’s capital. 

Despite the silence in the van, Seulgi noticed the former woman being driven deeper into her thoughts. She smiled at the Sooyoung, a little tug to reality. Seulgi passed her a water bottle then straddled her with her legs. Skin ship was common with Kang Seulgi, she was just that kind of person. She would make sure people knew they were valued, or maybe to distract them to their thoughts. Before Sooyoung knew it, Seulgi was huddling into the other, even though the group of five were cooped up in a little van. 

Yerim didn’t let the scene go unnoticed. Smirking, Yerim took a sip from her drink. 

 

Seulgi and Sooyoung. 

That was a thought. 


End file.
